Mike's Nuggets of Wisdom [January 2026]

Never be the last one in the pool.

When in doubt, always kiss the girl.

True wealth is blood and soil – kids and land.

Never split a check.

Never take an ex back. She tried to do better and is settling with you.

Never harp, worry, or wallow. It doesn't help.

Social media is a waste of time except for X. But it’s down to you to curate – and you get 100 experts, analysts, and personal assistants for free.

Desserts are for women. Order one and pretend you don’t mind that she’s eating yours.

No selfies. Aspire to experience photo-worthy moments in the company of a wonderful companion.

Never respond to a compliment with a compliment. The correct response is, “Thank you.”

Tip more than you should. It’s more local and more effective than most charities.

Ignore the boos. They usually come from the cheap seats.

Never make a scene.

Never admonish or criticize a partner in the presence of others.

Always carry cash. Keep some in your front pocket.

If it’s a problem money can solve, it’s not a problem.

Stand up to bullies. You’ll only have to do it once.

Never cancel dinner plans with a woman by text message.

Pretty women who are unaccompanied want you to talk to them.

You can get away with a lot more if you’re the one buying the drinks.

Don’t ever say, “it is what it is.”

Revenge can be a good way of getting over anger.

Staying angry is a waste of energy.

Always bring a bottle of something to the party.

Avoid that “last” whiskey. You’ve probably had enough.

Never show that you're impressed.

Facial hair should appear deliberate.

Say "Thank you" even when texting, not "Thanks" or "Thx".

Appreciate your parents. When they die, you become an orphan.

“Remember when” is the lowest form of conversation.

It’s okay to forgive, as long as you don’t forget.

Buy a tuxedo before you are thirty. Stay that size.

If you wear cologne, no one should smell it from five feet away or five minutes after you’ve left.

When giving a toast, short and sweet is always best.

If you are wittier than you are handsome, avoid loud clubs. Unless you're the DJ or MC.

Know when to ignore the camera.

Invest in great luggage. Then, use it.

Suck it up every now and then, especially for your family.

Family isn't always blood relation.

Don’t stare.

Read more. It allows you to borrow someone else’s brain.

Admit it when you’re wrong, and forgive yourself for your mistakes.

If you offer to help, don’t quit until the job is done.

Know at least one good joke.

There’s always another level. Just be content knowing that you are still better off than most who have ever lived.

When you marry someone, remember you marry their entire family.

If you don’t understand, ask before it’s too late.

Yes, of course you have to buy her dinner.

Never ask the same question twice.

Be kind. Life is hard enough as it is.

Know your way around a kitchen.

Nurture a handful of close friendships. It’s sounds obvious, but you can choose your friends.

Set goals. Write them down.

Stop talking about where you went to college.

Rebel from business casual. Burn your khakis and wear a suit or jeans.

It’s okay to trade the possibility of your 80s and 90s for more guaranteed fun in your 20s and 30s. But, in your 40s, get serious about health & fitness.

Never park in front of a bar.

Don't date while broke, out of shape, or in chaos—fix your foundation first, or relationships become distractions, not multipliers.

Play competitive sports for as long as you can.

Never date an ex of your friend.

Hookers aren’t cool, but the free ones are a lot more expensive.

When the bartender asks, you should already know what you want to drink.

Never stay out after midnight three nights in a row unless something really good comes up on the third night.

When people don’t invite you to a party, you really shouldn’t go. And sometimes even when you are invited, you shouldn’t go.

People get tired of the funny, drunk guy.

Put your phone away. You probably use it too often and at the wrong moments.

Don’t chase cheap dopamine – drugs, porn, and video games. Choose real life.

Eating out alone can be magnificent. Find a place where you can sit at the bar.

Do 50 push-ups and sit-ups before you shower each morning.

Eat lunch with friends as often as possible.

Be a regular at more than one bar.

Value a handful of truly close friends over a hundred acquaintances.

If you come from money, embrace it. If you don't, get there.

Be spontaneous.

One girlfriend at a time is probably enough.

The correct response to being told something you already know isn’t “I know.” It’s “You’re right.”

Throw parties. But have someone else clean up the next day.

Remember: You die twice, once when you stop breathing, and again when somebody mentions your name for the last time.

When you admire the work of artists or writers, tell them. And spend money to acquire their work.

Your clothes do not match. They go together.

If she expects the person you are 20% of the time, 100% of the time, then she doesn’t want you.

Date women outside your social set. You’ll be surprised.

If it’s got velvet ropes and lines, walk away unless you know someone.

You cannot have a love affair with whiskey because whiskey will never love you back.

Feigning unpretentiousness is worse than being pretentious.

Measure yourself only against your previous self.

Spin plates. Collect lottery tickets. Life is about the unknown unknowns.

Manual labor is therapy. A suntan is not bought; it is earned.

A long walk, fishing, or chess with a friend is better than therapy.

You don’t have to keep every secret, just the important ones.

Watch the sunset. You'll sleep better.

Never stop learning. Feed and nurture an intellectual curiosity. You can get an MBA on YouTube.

Celebrating birthdays is for women and children.

Don’t wait for the perfect pitch. Real life is not baseball. There’s no free trip to first base, and you’re not limited to three strikes. Just keep swinging.

If you’re staying more than one night, unpack.

Don’t fill up on bread.

You don’t have to like baseball, but you should understand the concept of what a pitcher’s ERA means. Approach life similarly.

A glass of wine or two with lunch will not ruin your day.

Place-dropping is worse than-name dropping.

When you meet someone for the second time, remind them what your name is.

In a world where 70% of men are overweight, getting in shape is the easiest way to demonstrate high-value status.

If you smile at the world, the world smiles back. You never know what worse luck your bad luck has saved you from." if something “bad” happens to you, you won’t really know if that event was actually good or bad for another 5 or 10 years. And the answer is within your control.

Gift randomly.

Focus on the habits, not the goals, and “the score takes care of itself.”

Accept your reality. Never stop trying to improve your reality. But along the way, accept it. This is the secret to happiness.

Own a handcrafted shotgun. It’s a beautiful thing.

Ask for a salad instead of fries. (This one wasn't easy for me)

When a bartender buys you a round, tip double.

Don’t use the word “closure” or ever expect it in real life. There may still be a mortally wounded Russian mobster roaming the woods, but we’ll never know.

Act like you’ve been there before.

Don’t argue with idiots, especially online.

Rules are for the obedience of fools and the guidance of wise men.

Go to bed tired.